“omg rainbow dash, I can’t believe you agreed to hang out with me!” Chirped Scootaloo happily, fluttering her runty little pigeon wings.
“Haha, no problem, Scoots. You’re a good kid.” Rainbow Dash creaked in reply, her bloodstained facade an artifact of Napoleonic France. “I’m glad we’re friends. Ready to start your flying lesson?”
“AM I EVER?” Scootaloo almost shat herself at the proposition, empty colon flexing in vain. “OMG RAINBOW DASH RAINBOW DASH RAINBOW DASH”
“Okay first I want you to put your head through this hole.” Groaned Rainbow Dash’s age-old timbers, which someone had stapled a pair of blue cardboard wings to. “Then I want you to grab that rope and give it a good pull.”
“OMG I’M LEARNING HOW TO FLY FROM RAINBOW DASH FOR REAL OMG OMGOMGOMG” Squealed the chicken, pulling over and over at the tasseled length of hemp rope that would release the blade hanging ever so precariously over her stupid little neck.
“It looks like it’s jammed.” Gilda commented, looking with a mixture of curiosity and disgust at the sight below her. “She’s totally not strong enough to pull the rope, Dash…” She chomped a dead rat down, swallowing the limp rodent down bones and all before adding. “You know, that said though, it’s pretty amazing this is actually working.”
“PULL IT HARDER!” Rainbow Dash bellowed into a megaphone affixed around her right hoof, sitting next on a cloud directly adjacent to her griffin friend. “C’MON DON’T YOU WANT TO FLY?” She put the bullhorn down and turned back to Gilda. “I’ve been trying to get that stupid kid off my case for two years now. It’s just my luck that her stupid little earth pony friend helped me build it.”
“Where’d you get the idea for a guillotine, anyway?” Gilda licked her beak, looking sidelong at Rainbow Dash.
“Oh you know, I was hanging out in Twilight’s library waiting for her to leave so I could suck Spike’s cock and she was babbling about ancient execution devices.” She shrugged. “idk I got inspired.” She lifted the bullhorn again and resumed screaming.
Gilda plugged her earholes with her talons, looking a bit disappointed. “Ew, straight.”
Rainbow finally finished her tirade and used her forehoofs to squeeze a section of cloud into her mouth to quench her thirst. “Gosh, shouting like that is really dehydrating- I’m parched!”
“Haha, that’s funny, Dash. Cuz I’m really wet.” Replied Gilda, pretty much like really suggestively.
“Gilda, you know I like guys now! I thought it was just a phase!” She moaned loudly as Gilda tweaked her crotchboob, finding herself quickly growing hot at the combined prospect of having sex on a cloud in the middle of Ponyville while Scoots inadvertently committed suicide below.
“It’s never just a phase, Dash. You know you’ve been missing licking my birdhole.” They kissed and it was a stunning union, grinding up against one another, Rainbow’s tail flagging as she pissed uncontrollably. (seriously horses do that)
Scootaloo was still down below, unable to work the infernal machine. Rainbow dash had stopped shouting. Was she mad? Nearing tears, she removed her head from the death-device, only to be struck in the face with a golden stream from a cloud hanging directly overhead. She spluttered and it got in her nose.